Every month, I make a list of five things I’m grateful for. There is always something to be grateful for – but some months, it’s a lot easier than others to make this list.
1. Our third (!!!) baby boy coming home. I’m still in disbelief – excited and terrified and all the other feels. There is uncertainty when it comes to adoptive family placements for the first few months; I’ve had to intentionally choose to push fear aside by focusing on gratitude. Today, I feel awe and wonder at the timing of life and at the miracle that is this new family of five I’ve got.
2. Watching Edgar, 5 years old, be a “big kid” big brother. Edgar was only 2 when Jonas first came home, so those big brother moments were very different. He loved to “hold” Baby Jonas (though it sounded more like “Baby Donuts” when he said it) – while an adult did most of the work for “keeping Baby Jonas alive” purposes – and he was generally smiley and happy about having a little brother. But now? He holds Baby C, almost independently; he brings wet diapers to the trash and retrieves dry ones; he is majorly helpful with Baby C duty on long road trips, mainly with pacifier support. He delights in Baby C, saying, “Are you so cutie?” in a ridiculous baby voice. He comes running when I announce that I need a “brother helper.” It is amazing and I love it – and him.
3. Watching Jonas, 3 years old, be a big brother for the first time! He is OBSESSED with his baby brother in an adorable and at times creepy way. He is fascinated with his hands – if Baby C is swaddled in a blanket, he tries to pull it open so that he can see his tiny baby hands and perchance rub his cheek on them. He lays beside him when Baby C is laying on his little baby activity mat. He says, “Oh, Charlie, you’re so cute!” while gazing at him in delight. It is oh-so-special.
4. Our Christmas tree – possibly my favorite thing every single holiday season. It is sweet and simple and perfect. You could take away the presents and the music and the outdoor lights and if I still had a Christmas tree with twinkly rainbow lights in my living room, I’d be the merriest.
5. A merry Christmas morning – my favorite morning of the year. Cinnamon rolls, excited kiddos, new books, and a baby to snuggle included.
Merry merry! So grateful for all my blessings.