I’ve written previously about my moments of experiencing flow. (See the Moments Of Flow post here!)
Paolo Coelho says, “When you want something, all the universe conspires to help you achieve it.” I think he’s indirectly talking about Flow when he says that. When you’re in the moment, and doing the next right thing, and moving gracefully and intentionally, then it just seems like life is guiding you along. Like you’re in a river and following the current.
I love this feeling – I love when I can feel Flow working for me in my life. And this feeling has been coming back to me over the course of these past few weeks.
One of the biggest challenges of the adoption wait has been feeling stuck – feeling frozen in time and place. With every decision and plan that’s been presented to Tee and me, I’ve felt like I’ve needed to postpone, to delay, to not make any major moves until the baby comes home. Wait until the baby comes home to apply for new jobs. Wait until the baby comes home to look for a new place to live. Even the littlest things, like waiting for the baby to come home to set up a visit with a particular friend or to start saving up for the honeymoon we haven’t taken yet.
That feeling that I’m stuck, that I can’t make any moves in any direction – I think it’s made the adoption wait a lot harder than it’s needed to be. It’s important for my soul that I am always growing, changing, and reaching. In order to feel like you’re in the Flow, you have to feel like you’re moving. You can’t get anywhere when you are frozen. I’m not talking about stillness – calm, peaceful stillness… That sounds lovely, cultivating stillness and peace in your life. Being frozen is something different.
Ever since I took myself off hold, pressing my internal defrost button, I’ve felt so much better. Things have been falling into place. There are difficult things happening, but I am moving myself forward, taking the next right step each time, and I have confidence that the flow is guiding me along. It makes it easier to wait for Our Baby when I feel like I am living my life. And ever since I started to take myself off hold, to unfreeze myself – things have been falling into place in this magical, wonderful way.
That’s what happens, when you let go and go with the flow. It’s magic. Crazy beautiful wonderful magic. When things start falling into place, it helps me to get some of my faith back. It’s still a challenge – because there’s so much uncertainty right now. But going with the flow is helping me to fill my heart with joy and peace, and to melt my worries away.