This blog post title is an homage to Brene Brown and her amazing book, The Gifts Of Imperfection. Read it immediately.
A positive thing about the adoption wait is that Tee and I have had lots of time to talk about the ways we want to parent. We used our Sunday afternoon, lazing on Deer Creek, as an opportunity to talk about what to do when kids say that they’re bored.
My understanding of boredom is that it’s good for the soul. When I’m bored, my mind has space to wander and to wonder.
I remember taking a course on teaching English as a second language a few years ago. Overall, the course was good – but I can only pay attention to indoor academics in thirty-minute spurts before I start to get bored. I used to bring blank looseleaf paper to class and when I started to feel bored, I’d start writing short stories – about my dad, whose death I was grieving acutely at that time, about my friends, about imaginary characters who popped into my head.
Tee and I want our kids to be bored sometimes. When you’re bored, you have the chance to exercise your creativity. When you’re bored, you invent new games. When you’re bored, you stretch your mind and your soul.
When I was in my early twenties, I was all about being busy. When I felt busy, I felt engaged, important, and distracted. I don’t know that I was necessarily happy with the busyness in my life, but I was too busy to realize that all the rushing around wasn’t really working for me.
Now, I am much more careful about guarding my time. I like to have time and space free to be filled with things I haven’t thought of yet. And I want our kids to have that kind of time and space, too.