Today I switched up my routine and went running on the NCR trail. (NCR stands for Northern Central Railroad, I believe; if you want more information than that, then Google is your friend.)
I was hoping that today’s run would be a little longer and stronger than my jaunts have been lately. My normal running loop is hilly and strenuous, and the NCR trail is completely flat. (Which is one of the reasons I love it. That and you’re surrounded by gorgeous scenery.) However, it was hard for me to get myself going today. I ran for approximately ten minutes and then started to walk.
I realized that this was an opportunity for some #soul food. I have several meditation apps on my phone – my two favorites are Stop Breathe & Think and Headspace. I decided to use Stop Breathe & Think to listen to a meditation as I walked.
With Stop Breathe & Think, you do a check-in before your meditation. You indicate how you’re doing physically and mentally, and you name five emotions you are experiencing at that moment. Yesterday I chose worried, despairing, anxious, nervous, and lacking confidence. (Which sounds so sad. Really, I wasn’t feeling all that terribly. But these days, when asked about my emotions, I immediately think about my feelings related to the adoption wait, and those are the feelings I identify with most strongly.)
The app then recommended a meditation focused on change and acceptance, which I listened to as I walked. Technically, I should be sitting down someplace comfortably when I meditate. But what do I care about those rules? Every time the meditation indicated that I should focus on the contact between my body and my seat, I felt the earth beneath my feet. I’ve been badly in need of some #soul food lately; life gets so crazy and hectic, and it’s hard to keep my feet on the ground when my mind is in the future, in the past, everywhere but right here and right now. When I meditate, even if I only do it for five minutes, it brings me back to the present moment. Which is where I need to be.